President Bush to Give Speech in Canadia

Former President George W. Bush to hit lecture circuit with March 17 speech in Canada

Link: http://www.startribune.com/nation/39520802.html

DALLAS - Former President George W. Bush is getting ready to hit the lecture circuit.

A co-owner of a Canadian company that organizes high-profile speaking events confirmed Thursday that Bush is scheduled to speak March 17 at a luncheon in Calgary, Alberta.

The invitation says Bush will discuss "his eight momentous years in the Oval Office" and "the challenges facing the world in the 21st century."

The event is Bush's first confirmed speaking engagement. Booking agency partner Andy McCreath declined to discuss Bush's speaking fee. A spokesman with the Office of George W. Bush in Dallas also declined comment.

McCreath says he expects about 1,500 people to attend the speech. Event sponsors include the Calgary Chamber of Commerce, an accounting firm, a law firm and an organization for financial analysts.

So after two months of clearing brush in Preston Hollow, the President will venture out into the world he so recently controlled. But not America. Oh no, that would be too obvious. He's headed to the Great White North to give a speech. But why do the Canucks get to be wowed with his speaking skills while Americans are frozen out?

Two words: HE IS CAMPAIGNING. Not for President, or even Prime Minister. President Bush is going for the big prize: Secretary-General of the United Nations.

But Maynard, you say. The UN is the epitome of everything wrong with the Not USA parts of the world! And you're right. But if we're going to fix this crazy planet of ours, we need great leadership at the top. This way, President Bush will be able to do his thing, rescuing our species from certain destruction, while he waits for Barack HUSSEIN Obama to screw up so badly, he is tossed out by an angry mob, leaving the door open for The Restoration.

Talk aboot a brilliant plan, eh?